Back to the Blog again..

"I Believe everything happens for a reason.

People change so you can learn to let go."

Where do I even begin? I will admit that I sit down from day to day and stare at the computer screen with THIS blog on in and draw a blank. Not really knowing where to start,what to say,or how to even explain this past year. Tonight,a few things happened that made me pause,think,and flip back to my original blog. Where it all happen,began,and hopefully wont end. I started a few other blogs,but it just was not the same. I could not refer back to the day this or that happened and flip to the picture or quote. I know YES..It is ME and the KIDS..and YES..the past is still posted to go back to,BUT I have to keep moving on and see where my "Road less traveled" takes me.

I have learned in this past year so much,I could scream and scream so loud that WOW there is life,pain,feelings,real people,experience,heartache,growing,life lessons,challenges,tears,laughs,cries all on the flip side of letting go of 1 thing so important in your life for the past 13 years, and seeing a whole other world. Maybe a world that was always there/here but HE blocked me from it,protected me,always had me turn the other way? I am beginning to see this and think this as the year has flown by since Jon and I separated and filed divorce.

Aww...yes I said it out loud..ha ha..

I don't know what the future holds for the kids and I. I do know that I left,lost and let go of my best friend,and soulmate for the past 13 years last summer. Hardest thing I have ever had to do and live with daily. But.when I get a email or text from Afghanistan,he went back into the Army,and he expresses how happy he is,how he gets to finish what he started, and just that he knows that this journey had to turn back down that "road" to have him be complete. Now,we will see where my "road" takes me. As this past year,its been a crazy bumpy wild ride and I have learned so much about the world and myself that I have to take a deep breath,and try and take life as it comes day by day. Easier said then done.

Instead of sticking this blog up on the shelf to get dusty and ignored and avoided. I thought, I dont want to start a new one,because this is ME and my PAST and hopefully journal my future as God lays the bricks in front of me as I walk beside him.

Friday night,my 4 bugs in bed,and I on the MAC once again..every tomorrow holds a new test of faith,a new lesson to learn and experience. Laugh,cry and try to pick yourself up and keep going. I can only pray that at the end of my road,there is a answer..shinning bright and I see it soon so I can run and chase after it!

AND THEN THERE WERE 5......