Jon in Addis

Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive".

~Howard Thurman

I finally have a moment to post Jon's pictures he took while picking up Bryce. Jon took TONS of pictures, so I picked a few to post, but gosh he took so many random. I thought I would put the ones with Abebe and Aster since people don't know what they look like sitting at the table and standing with Jon. I love the one with the lady walking away and her garment blowing behind her and it looks like maybe a umbrella in her hands as she exits the gates, it grabs me. It's interesting to see what pictures a guy takes with a camera compared to you when you go a few times. :) As far away as Addis is, as sick as we have all gotten, and as much as I love being in American...the country STILL calls my name! Not for adoption,but for something else..who knows what is in store for the future, we will see what projects and adventures may come across my path.

A moment,a thought,no regrets,a future...

Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Aslynn's Crib in Toukoul Orphanage
Bryce's Crib in Toukoul Orphanage

This weekend and the past few days have been going really good. We are slowly healing up, sores closing and I can tell we are getting better. I feel a lot better and I am excited for tomorrow's doctors appointment for the kids to get them all checked out and the thumbs up that EVERY last bit of everything they all had is gone. I'm dying for tomorrow to come.

Bryce ate meat yesterday, I know doesn't sound too great, but its a big deal for a little man that has only gained 1 lb and is so tiny and need to put some weight on. I was so happy and proud as we have tried and tried and he just shrugs meat away. Well,yesterday my little man actually ate some, actually a lot, and smiled and enjoyed his hot dog all cut up. It was a different brand than we normally use, go figure, little picky boy. :) He doesn't like Mac and Cheese either,Ravioli's,chili,beans,the list goes on. He would be happy with milk or formula, BUT the doctor says FOOD FOOD and we do both and do exactly what the doctor says plus supplements. I think he just burns the food off so fast as he eats and walks in the walker or is crawling so fast everywhere. If he was not mobile I could see him gaining weight but he is all over the place. I hope the doctor can give me some answers or we can do a xray of his hips. When he stands he tilts and is off a bit with his hips, and how his legs go out when laying down.

I feel a lot better mentally today, I feel like I got a boost of support through friends and emails of other people that have gone through or going through a lot of what I am going through or have already. I give all these woman a round of applause, especially the woman that check that spot for special needs children, I applaud you for your actions and think only the highest for you.

I wish my story was one for the books, a happy fairytale "couture life" ending, but it will keep going on for awhile until everyone heals mentally,physically,and emotionally. I wish that our 2nd adoption went so great as the 1st. But again, maybe we were blinded by the thought of bringing her home that we did not see the bumps in the road along the way. The agency did change as we went from Aslynn to Bryce. They grew from a low number of clients to a large and when he has so many families and not the staff to support it, there are cracks along the road, and a few must fall through those cracks.

I want to be able to share my whole journey, from start to end with nothing left out. The uncensored version of "the road less traveled", and I will, I just want to phrase it right as I don't want people not to adopt or stop adopting just because of my experience, as I would do it over again in a heart beat. I DON'T regret my decision,I know God gave me my 2 blessings for a reason and I love them dearly. I see my family growing into something wonderful as time goes on. United and bonded forever, I see that when I got the calling to adopt, I know I first had to stop myself in my tracks and really pray hard about what I was going to do and wow what a big step. I followed my heart,my Lord,and my dreams and they have lead me here. It might not be the prettiest place right now, but soon this garden will bloom and the flowers will grow and when they do, we will all see the blessings that came out of Ethiopia and into our home.

8,923 miles away there are 2 cribs. One in the boys section, one in the girls section,already filled with a new baby sharing its space with another. Where my 2 lived,ate,drank and the life they knew before the day I got to hold them and bath them and love them and let them in on a whole new world. This road is just beginning for them both, let us heal,let us mend,let us love and unite forever. We are a family,strong and bonded with so much love to give to each other and to share. Thank you all for your prayers and support. I know my writing is as I am talking literally so you have to take it as I am standing with you face to face.Very blunt and chatty. :) I hope to get some time to catch up and read all of your blogs again and see where you are at in life and your adoptions, I am so behind!

First Day of School!

First Day at Joy

Makenzie started 1st grade, yes can you believe it, first grade on August 10th. Logan started a week later preschool 3 days a week. I miss him so much, its so hard to drop them off, they are growing up so fast, they are little people now, not babies. They are blessed to attend Church of Joy Private School and get a Christian Education. Makenzie takes dance,cooking,golf and chess after school. The crazy child really loves activities and has a blast. I love to see smiles on their faces.

Jonas Brothers Concert

Mom and Makenzie night at the Jonas Brothers Concert

Paris and Shawna,Paris falls asleep at EVERY concert, its so loud, we don't know how she does it, but its too cute and she is a doll!

Dancing with the Jonas glow sticks


Jonas Brothers, My Fav is Joe..he is my crush :) HA

Jonas FAN smile

Ice Cream and a Concert!

Mom and Makenzie

My feet addiction

August 11th Makenzie and I joined Shawna,Paris,Rose Mary and Jacque for a night of fun at the Jonas Brothers Concert. The girls had a blast, and we did too! They performed so well and did some great interaction and put on a show for us. It was a late night, but fun :)

Faith,Life,Moving Forward...

If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, "move from here to there," and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you. (Matthew 17:20)

I got a thought on the way home from dropping KK off at school and decided to set everything aside for a little while and sit down at the actual computer, check emails and blog. I hope to get pictures and my updates up on here, lets see how far I can get.

Life has been rough, I will admit it. 4 kids is not different than 3, I don't see that as a issue, I think that we got hit with a lot more than we thought or bargained for with Bryce and since the arrival of him its been none stop and we are all so worn and beat up mentally.

After Bryce arrived and he had to go into the hospital, coming out and home, we all got scabies! It went away, came back and went through cycles. We had to be treated with 10% Permethrin cream and the oral Ivermin and we still seem to show signs it.
We have been treated a few times at the Mayo Clinic hospital and numerous doctors and specialists due to Intestinal Parasites, Bacteria in the blood,worms,scabies,lice,and my brain is not working I know some other stuff.

We are recovering and taking meds and trying to get up to speed but we cant seem to get over the problems this has caused. Also, African Termites..Nice! And some other bugs from Africa have infested our house and even in bedded into our skin, the doctors are literally pulling BUGS of all kinds OUT of our skin. Hands,feet,arms,legs,fingertips, face etc! Its the weirdest things you would ever see, and our bodies are scared up.

We have infectious disease helping us at the Mayo Clinic and 2 wonderful doctors at the hospital that have taken so much time and care for us, its been nice.

Its a ongoing battle that seems to not have a end yet, we are praying, and its hard, and its a struggle. On top of that, Bryce is not gaining weight, very picky eater, happy as can be, crawls, gets on knees, can stand holding on things, walk in walker, and do a lot of things. I DO think he is OVER 2 years old, I don't think he is 18 months. I DON'T think he will grow fast, or be very tall if he does. He will struggle in life and really have a hard time to catch up if possible.

We will resource all options of course for help and therapy, we CANT now, which everyone emails me about. HE IS CONTAGIOUS, and NOBODY will come near him! New patches show up here and there of all sorts of funky stuff, and than I am his primary person that touches him, so I get it, and it gets passed through the house.

I think the hardest part is that I have to stay away from Makenzie and Logan so they are over the bug and scabies so they can have some sort of normal life and go to school. So washing bedding everyday, washing them, medicine from head to toe, and then I cant hug and hold them, and they cant cuddle up with me. Its very very hard, and than THEY SEE that I can touch and hold the 2 babies and change their diapers bath them and feed them, but not the 2 older?! I can explain to them a million times, but THEY ARE KIDS, and emotions and thoughts still in their little brains. Its heart breaking when your children cry to you about not getting love, attention, etc because of Bryce and his needs. Because Mom is in the hospital again, or the meds have made me so weak.

The kids have been through A LOT with this adoption, I look into their eyes and can see how much they want to give him and I love and cant. And they want him to be apart of our lives closer, but he has limits and he is so fragile. Its a tough spot to be in. My family is not that close so I don't have anyone that comes over, helps,gives me a break, etc. Its been none stop since he arrived. Of course no sitters or nannies want to be around sick people, and if you saw the marks all over us, you would stand 10 feet away. My sister has helped with walking the kids into class and out to the car for me, that has been such a big help. I hate not being able to do it, its so hard to watch them walk away and I drive off to go home clean the whole house again, wash everything again, and start all over again for when I go and get them from school. Its a cycle that feels like a trap. Its so wearing on me mentally physically and emotionally. I am very blessed to have met Joy from our board. She has given me so much support through the phone and email and just prayer. She is amazing, and I hope she is blessed by the Lord is so many ways with her life and family and all she does. Its amazing, I would love and die to have one ounce of the strength she has and the drive she gives to her family,faith,and others. I am so lucky she is in my life.

Now how do you attach and bond and get so tight with a new baby when you are getting sick from him? you are watching you and your family have to be on medicine, go to doctors, get things from him, that YOU exposed them to?! Hard to deal with as a Mom, hard.

I pray and pray WHY, I know I was suppose to go back to Africa and get him, and now all this bad that follows with us. Not only all this but I could write a book of just our lives in general seem to be at a stand point or crash point since his arrival. We pray and know God has direction for us. Answers, and will lead us to where he wants us in life. We hope we can heal, bond, and move forward with our lives and put all this bad,illness,etc behind us and just go back to LIFE and LIVING! This is NOT suppose to be like this, I understand delay, and that he will need help to catch up, that's fine, but to hit me with all these medical issues on top of it, WOW.. blows my mind. I feel like a punching bag, and when doctors know you by name and the pharmacist's and special medicine ordered in for you, the list goes on, IT WEARS YOU OUT.

Just a little of whats going on here, I need to post past things like first day of school, and concert, and other stuff. I need to catch up and have time for me and a moment to think :) thanks for every ones love and support and emails. Its nice to have people out there even though you are not here..literally.

When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. (Psalm 34:17)

Growing,Smiling,Loving,Walker

Like any other living, growing thing, love requires effort to keep it healthy."
~Leo F. Buscaglia

I need to measure Bryce, I think he has gotten longer in the past 3 weeks, seriously! He is still tiny, size 2 shoes are too big for him and he is suppose to really be around 2 yrs old. He was starved too long, its sad.But with tons of work, I am determined to get him caught up. We have been working on straightening his legs, standing with him, as when he first came he would only go into the fetal position when you would try to get him to stand on his feet. Now with help he will put his feet down, and hold on to the chair, we practice and his wobbly little legs stand strong and its amazing the drive this child has to catch up. He does some sign language, more when he wants more and all done when he is done. He will crawl to you and reach up as high as he can for you to hold him, he latches on like none of my other children ever do, rests his head on my shoulder and wraps his legs around my tight, its such a loving comfort feeling for the 2 of us. I sling him around the house, of course aslynn get jealous but when I do it to her, she wants down, shes a mover and a shaker, not a snugga like Bryce.

I got him into the walker for the first time and he at first sat and did not know what to do, then started just going backwards. I figured out this little boy loves yogurt so I stood a few feet away with yogurt and after a few huffs and puffs he walked forward for a bite, of course got rewarded and walked all over the house for bites. Now he is a walking fool around, not straight legs but he is mobile in the walker. I dont know how long it will take him to pull himself up,walk on his own, or do things that Aslynn can do, even though she is younger. But I hope that watching her he will catch on and want to copy her. The journey has begun and we are hoping goals will be met and he becomes stronger daily. I wish he would put weight on, I have tried everything the doctor said and every type of food, if anyone knows any tricks to weight gain, I am all ears because I have tried it all!

We are Blessed, and Thank God all day for our family.

Finally a long update...and pictures of Aslynn

“Wisdom is a blessing only to those prepared to absorb it."

I have been so busy with Bryce that I have not been blogging in awhile. I finally told Jon I had to sit down and update a little today. So here I am, sitting on my laptop with the kids playing in the living room, Bryce crawling around the floor and Jon giving Aslynn a bath. I have a moment and I thought, OK its time to chat.

Life has been off and on good for the past 3 weeks since we brought Bryce home. He is so sweet and so gentle its amazing that he has bonded and just became such a part of this family so easily, much more than Aslynn at the beginning. BUT, Aslynn did not have the health issues that Bryce has been going through. With scabies,pox,malnourishment,hospital trips,the abuse he has been through during his time either before his mom left him at the orphanage or there (he has burn marks all over his body, the hospital had to get CPS to talk with us, and we had to prove that he was recently adopted and that there was no way we could have done them in that short of time)

He has been through a lot, I wish I knew, I wish I could talk with him and he could share with me all that he has had to go through to get to our loving home. He was in the orphanage too long, I can start off by saying that. He was dropped off last July. They give us a bday that would put him at 17 months old. BUT we had a bone density test done and they put him at 2 years old. Which this is very disappointing as once a child goes past their first year so malnourished its hard to have them recover in a good amount of time or at all. We have been working with him day in and day out. He is pretty much like a infant, small, tiny, his hands are the smallest little thing. Of course because of Rickets his head sticks out and is large, his tummy bloated, and he has water diarrhea so bad. The doctors have tried 3 different meds and I even started him on one we brought back from Africa. We have tried different formula, as he needs to be on it to gain weight. And we started him on solids, he had never had them before, so that was interesting to teach him to swallow. He is missing hair around his head from being starved for such a long time, he is 5% below for weight for a 17 month old, and 5% below for height.

He is a snuggle bug, smiles, seems so grateful that we are here for him. When he wakes up and I go to get him, he glows and beams like "wow she is still here, and she is not leaving me"

He can crawl, now can sit up by himself, and go from sitting up and back to tummy alone. We practice 2 to 3 times a day with him standing and building his legs. He does not like this at all, he wobbles but holds on to the chair and sweats and gets a work out from it. You can tell he is trying and fighting and getting stronger daily. When we first got him he could not use the lower part of his body, he was in the crib for over a year, the nannies said he got out about 1 time a day, but sharing a crib and just laying there has made his legs bowed and so oddly twisted. He can turn his feet completely backwards, its so strange.

The hospital did mental tests and he is ok and not retarded in anyway, just very behind and needs love and a family that has the patience to focus on him. Its hard, I will admit it. I did not know what I was getting into. I don't have family or friends that help or give me a break, so its a constant daily battle to work with him. In the beginning he wouldn't wake up, it would take us almost 2 hours, and he wouldn't eat, that is why we had to get him to the hospital and on IVs. Now he eats, and he wakes up, he is getting stronger daily, if he is outside in the heat it wears him out and he passes out, so he is inside pretty much from car to house.
I cant really go anywhere or run errands until Jon comes home from work because he has constant water poop that leaks and explodes everywhere. Aslynn caught it, Kenzie did, I did, Jon did, and then we all recovered but Bryce. We hope that soon it will fade away or die down a little so that we can leave the house without a big mess all over us and where ever we are at.

He is a tiny little blessing that I think God gave us to learn from. I pray that he can grow and become a normal boy that can catch up to his age and really go full force in the world.

Having 2 babies 3 months apart is more work than I thought it would be. But having 4 is not that bad. Just the diapers, and cups of milk, and feeding and fighting over toys, that's the downfall. The good point is they talk and babble to each other and you can tell they have a special bond.

Makenzie and Logan love them both and just kiss and hug on them, we have all become so attached to them both, its like they came from my tummy and nowhere else.
I am happy we did the adoptions, I would not change my mind or decision for one second as I see what I can offer and how I can make life better for these 2 babies. I know its only 2 out of millions of children out there, but its a start, and maybe someone will see what I am doing and follow along and we can help and save these children from disease,death,abandonment.

I wish I was more prepared with Bryce and all that he has wrong. All the medical reports the agency gave me were false,and when Jon brought home his actually file there were pages and pages of information,illness, etc that was not disclosed to us. We learned more than we knew and wow this kid has been to hell and back. I think God had us NOT bring him home in May because I don't think he would have lived for the plane ride. He was no malnourished when we got there, and the visa was not there, and of course the condition he was in. There is no way he would have survived the flight. Jon flying him home this time was hard and Jon kept having to check that he was still breathing. It was a rough flight but he made it and he is doing better day by day.

I had to post some pictures, I guess since I am talking about Bryce they should be of him, but I am doing by date, so these are Aslynn, my little walker, chatter,independent girl that has the funniest attitude and just owns you and the world just better move aside. Bryce is shy and appreciative that you give him love and attention, Aslynn could careless and push you away to go to the next person or a toy. 2 totally different personalities, but again Aslynn was only in the orphanage for about 4 months. Bryce over a year and he zones to his own world in high stress situations. Its sad what can happen to a child that has not gotten love, attention, touch, and fed. I see now the flip side of the 2 different children, and would not know the full effect if I did not get Bryce. We are happy with our decision, with the 4 children and we cant wait to see them all grow up to be loving,open minded, aware of the world and its surroundings and most of all know where they all came from and how they all are connected with loving arms and hearts.

God is good, and I pray the days ahead get better for Bryce (he has gotten 4 teeth just in 3 weeks) and he grows and flourishes in our environment.

Picking Jon up at the Airport

In you the orphan finds mercy.
Hosea 14:3

Jon came home late around 11 with Bryce a few weeks ago. Unshaven Jon with a Bjorn on, you have to love it. The kids made signs and were so excited to meet their brother, Aslynn was so tired I don't think she knew what was going on. As you can see we have a car full now, from 2 to 4, amazing how this past year has flown by and changed our lives forever. Some might think I am a nut, my crazy idea of adoption and expanding my family, but I felt a calling and I walked down this road, and I am dying to see what else God has in store for me and the family.

Bryce was very dehydrated and not wanting to eat when he first arrived, he had rashes and scabies. I took him to our doctor the next day he arrived and got medicine, but he worsened with not eating over the weekend so we took him to Phx Children's hospital. I must say, if I was to do both adoptions over again, I would go from airport to hospital, have all the specialist look at the kids and run tests. With aslynn I saw the doctor, and went to individual specialists for each problem. With Bryce we got it all knocked out and seen by doctors during his stay there. He is now at home, thriving, eating a lot, and building muscle tone.
He was so weak when he arrived, couldn't hold his cup, lift his hand or grasp anything. Amazing what food does to the body.

He now is crawling around the whole house, if I put him up he will hold on to the table and stand there. He babbles, wakes up by himself (he would crash and not wake up, it would take me 2 hrs to wake him up)he is eating great,plays so good with Aslynn, the older kids just eat up that smile and charm he has. He is delayed for his age, which they guess is older than we are told but we are keeping him at March 16th. He learns something new everyday and I know he will catch up to aslynn and start walking and doing more things. He does sign language for what he needs, which is great he caught on to that. His legs are weak as they have never been used, and now he is getting exercise and actives. He loves to go in the car, he is always smiling and happy. His personality is so different than Aslynn's. She is more independent, not that much of a snug bug but loves attention. Bryce wants to be held, loved on, rocked and just given attention. He was in the orphanage for over a year, could you imagine, poor guy; Aslynn only 4 months. There is a HUGE difference when they stay longer and get into that mindset, start shutting down the world and emotions. BUT I am luck I found a way to turn him back on slowly,he is waking up to the world for the first time, and at first I think maybe mourning leaving the only place he knows, but now I see smiles and laughs and wanting to learn and see new things around with me.

I now need to find the time to keep my blog updated, I have pictures of what we have been up to, but need the time to get online.

Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers, its been a bumpy road, and I know its not over yet, so we are still trekking it and learning so much about ourselves.